Living with Disabilities: A Letter

At Villages of Hope Africa, we are very thankful for all of the people who help make our work possible through their support. Recently, an anonymous donor blessed us with a gift that we are using to improve the care and facilities we provide for our special needs children at VOH Mwanza. This lady has a special spot in her heart for these children as she too is physically disabled and moves around in a wheelchair. She wrote the following letter to the children she connected with at VOH and we want to share it with you (with her permission) because we believe this letter offers great advice and inspiration for all of us.

My dear family in Africa, first I want to let you know I have your pictures and my best friend Kimi and I pray for each of you often. Many years ago I dreamed of helping children in an orphanage and God in His wisdom brought Kimi and me together with all of you.

In Ontario, Canada (where Kimi and I live) I have worked as a volunteer first in elementary schools and now listening to people who call to talk to me on the phone. I also go to church every week. I live alone with my cat, and my hobbies are reading, writing, teaching, and using the computer.

I am physically disabled, and must use a wheelchair to move around.

I put together a composition with some of the life tips I wish someone taught me when I was a child and young adult. I hope as you become able to understand, your caregivers will help you put into practise anything in my life lessons that is appropriate for your life and culture.

Tips to Make Living with a Disability Easier:

Make a habit of looking for things and people in your life you’re grateful and happy for. The richest people in the world are not those who have everything. The richest people are those who make a habit of being grateful for what they have and what they can do. These people have an endless supply of richness and joy in life.
Everything in life worth having and doing takes time and effort to achieve and maintain. Don’t expect life to be easy. Hard work and struggle make the good things in life sweeter.
Be grateful for everything you can do and take nothing and no one for granted.
Spend a few minutes each morning and before bedtime thinking about the people and blessings you’re happy to have in your life. This will help you stay positive.
God has given everyone talents and gifts. Work hard to discover and use whatever talents and gifts you have.
Look for opportunities to help and serve others. Ask God’s help and wisdom in finding people who need your help that you can serve. Everyone has something they can give to others. If you can smile, God can put someone in your life who needs to see your smile. If you can listen, God can put people in your life who need to be heard. Smiling and listening are acts of giving and service, too.
Look for good in others and yourself. There is good in everyone, including you!
However you serve others, do it cheerfully without expecting anything back. You may never know the impact your act of kindness has on someone’s life; so be grateful that you were able to serve, hope for good to come from your acts of kindness, and leave the rest to God.
Ask for help when you need it, both from God and from the people you trust. Don’t forget to receive help cheerfully; everyone needs help sometimes—it’s part of being human. God created us to give and receive help on purpose; it creates friendship and gives life meaning.
The two hardest things to do in life are to love deeply and forgive completely. Letting people into your heart is the only way to love and keep a great friend and be a great friend. Every loving relationship is made up of happy and sad moments. Live the happy moments joyfully and forgive the pain you cause each other.
Practice forgiveness daily. Forgive God for what happens in your life that seems unfair so your faith can grow. Also, forgive yourself for your shortcomings, so you don’t life with guilt, shame, and frustration.
Forgive those who hurt you so you don’t carry bitterness and anger in your heart any longer than you have to because these feelings only hurt you and prevent you from being all you’re meant to be. Most people who hurt you don’t mean to and those who do need to be forgiven and given to God to handle on your behalf. It can take a while for forgiveness to travel from your mind to your heart, so say “I forgive” often when you need to and trust God to help you persevere until the pain is gone.
Say you’re sorry and make amends to the people you hurt. This takes courage and integrity.
Live one day at a time as fully as you can. You may not do what others do in the same way others do it, but do what you can and know it’s okay to be different and do things differently. Some of the people who make the most positive differences in the world think, dream, and act differently. Know there is only one you and only you can do what God created you for.

I have no idea what mission each of you has, but I do know you will teach the dear people who take the time to love and care for you and really get to know you much about patience, compassion, love, gratitude, encouragement, forgiveness, communication, friendship, courage, and commitment as they help you become all God created you to be.

Being disabled can be painful at times, but my hope is that each of you discovers the blessings that come with it, too.

Learn everything you can, from everyone you can. Everyone in the world has something to learn and everyone has something to teach. Even the people who make life miserable can teach us how not to live. Spread joy, love, hope, kindness, and encouragement to others every chance you get.

Look for good in yourself, others, and in your life. Ask God to help you find it and pray when you can with your voice or your thoughts. God can read your heart.

I encourage you to think about what making the world a better place would look like to you. If you can think it and dream it, maybe one day you will get a chance to share your thoughts and dreams with someone who can make your dreams reality. Thoughts and dream of good things are something everyone can have, and they are especially important to anyone with a disability.

I wish for each of you that you become givers and receivers of faith, hope, and love.

Most of all, may you always have a God-given dream that keeps you hopeful when life gets tough.

In closing, I will leave you with two quotes we had in the classroom when I was teaching (I don’t know the authors):

“You can if you think you can.”
“Good, better, best, never let it rest until your good gets better and your better becomes your best.”

Because you live with disabilities, your best will be different each day. As long as you know you’re giving your best, you’re moving forward in life. That’s what counts.

By the way, my best friend as a child had a form of Cerebral Palsy that gave her no ability to speak and very little ability to control her movements. She became an artist, painting with her mouth, and her stories (typed with one finger) gave me a lifelong love of writing.

God bless each of you. I hope to hear more about each of you someday.